Well, we all have heard of the Twilight phenomenon. If you haven't, please remove your head from that hole in the sand with as much haste as possible because any longer in your happy place and you'll be beyond medical attention. This plotless, without-logic, piece-of-shit, wanna be tragic romance novel has taken over the minds and hearts the majority of teenage girls everywhere in the world. Begin panicking now.

But, really, what is so attractive about fucking Twilight? Here's my basic rundown of this series. First of all, this totally melodramatic bitch decides that she wants to be a crazy little cunt and she runs off to live with her extremely kind and caring father, who she inexplicably hates, in a town that makes her miserable and holds absolutely no future for her. Then, she decides that despite the fact that despite the fact that everyone loves her immediately for some off-the-wall reason, she hates them ALL, except for those over-the-top Gods and Goddesses that hate everyone and refuse to even look at anyone else in the school.

Then, this bitchy, whiny, crazy-ass Mary-sue throws herself full-force into an obsession that borders on mental instability with this Adonis-like guy.

From the description of Edward, out knight in shining armor, he is sickly-looking from the paper white tint of his skin and the enormous perpetual bags underneath his eyes. Not to mention the fact that he may or may not be suffering from multiple personality disorder. The only problem with that theory is he barely has enough of a character to have one personality, let alone more. Somehow, in his amazingness, he manages it, though, and thus we have our perfect love interest who is just creepy and abusive enough to be alluring to a psycho like Bella.

Bella skanks around for most of the book, trying to use as many people as possible in her quest to fuck the creepy stalker she is in lust with. After they finally get together, the two of them instantly run into people that want to kill Bella because she is just that special.

Now, understand that on any other day the Cullens would never have run into these crazy ass vampires, but the day that Bella's with them, they run into the craziest, ugliest of them all. Because only good guys are hot.

Then, insert lots and lots of over-the-top angst and drama on both Edward and Bella's part.

That concludes the first book.

The next one, Edward ups and goes because he realizes that Bella's even more of a crazy cunt than he thought and she goes into a meltdown because she's just that obsessed. Then she proceeds to make herself even more of a crazy bitch and be awful to everyone because her abusive boyfriend upped and left and took his whole family and every trace of their existence with him.

Then, she gets over it and decides to work on having someone else be her fuck-buddy. Of course, she picks the boy who has a massive crush on her because wouldn't it be so fun to mess with his head? With that thought in mind, they become best friends. Then, Bella does some stupid, daredevil thing and Edward, devastated and thinking she'd offed herself because of him, runs off to do the same.

Bella runs after him and following some ridiculous villains being introduced and us discovering more of Bella's unique mary-sue-ness, they go back home to Forks to have some heartwarming ending.

The third book is all about Bella trying to tell Jacob that she was just fucking around after Edward ditched her and that she's back with the abusive vampire now. Then, they have to have a dramatic battle. Amidst all of this melodrama, Jacob tries to rape Bella and Bella does many underhanded things because that makes her so much more relatable.

So, we have a whole slew of characters with obsessive personalities and some ridiculously badly-formed love triangle between a crazy, abusive, sickly 'God-like' bloodsucker, a Mary-Sue that could put those fanfiction writers who throw themselves into their favorite fandom as love interests to shame, and some crazy future rapist/ werewolf that is obsessed with the Mary-Sue.

So, my point is, these books suck worse than the Life of Pi, which is hard to do as anyone who's read the book knows. These are a waste of your money and I advise against boosting Ms. Meyer's enormous ego lest she decide to write more hideous novels. I offer no apology to Ms. Meyer or any of her psychotic fans because I really think you shouldn't leave enormous, gaping, over-the-top blatantly conspicuous logic-shaped holes in your shitty plot. If your book's going to be full of clichés, at least have them make a little bit of sense.

Over and Out,

AI

Who could love me? I am out of my mind!

I take no credit for that line or the title of this entry. That all goes to Panic! at the Disco and their song She Had the World (fantastic band. If you've decided that because they're 'emo' you shan't listen to them, well, you're missing out on some bitchin' tunes). 

Now that I have changed my journal title to the wonderful Cacoethes Scribendi (look it up-- it's in Latin) I think I shall post something written by me... But what shall I do? Well, I'll just make this up as I go.


The square was calm and everything from the store names to the street lamps had gone off at least an hour previously. The fountain bubbled loud enough to wake the dead in the silence of the peaceful night. Then, as everything was settled, came a singing. The soft, childish voice broke the silence with the occasional failed note. 

"...Through the wind and the rain she stands hard as a stone..." 

The only light in the entire square, a display in the front of the biggest clothing store, dropped soft light onto a young girl who could not be older than ten. Her hands shoved deep into her pockets and her head angled down so as to let her pretty golder curls fall into her face.

"...But her dreams give her wings and she flies to a place where she's loved..."

She moved slowly out of the light, her voice slowly getting quieter.

"... concrete angel..."

And as the angel in the fountain played her harp, the childish voice faded and disappeared, along with any traces of the young girl.


Wow... safe to say that was random... Hope you enjoyed my randomness...

Over and out, AI

So surveys are probably one of the wierdest hobbies I have but sometimes when I see them (if it's obnoxiously early in the morning like right now) I can't resist temptation and fill them out. Right now is one such time and here I go...

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
ear. "If you start making a noise your Mother'll hear it. And you know

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch?
Side table, water bottles, alarm clock, purse

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Criminal Minds

4. Without looking, guess what time it is.
3:23

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
3:17

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
An impressively loud fan

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Um... maybe about 8:30... I was watching my brothers play lacrosse and playing with my dog.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
The keyboard

9. What are you wearing?
PJs...

10. Did you dream last night?
Technically I dream every night, constantly, just like everyone else. Do I remember dreaming? No.

11. When did you last laugh?
When I was talking to my brother, my sister, and my sister's boyfriend about the huge ass spider on the stairs....

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Two huge mirrors and a framed Da Vinci Code movie poster

13. Seen anything weird lately?
The hugest spider you will ever lay eyes on and its millions of babies on my basement steps. It is probably the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my life.

15. What is the last film you saw?
Lars and the Real Girl. It was actually rather cute...

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
I'd invest. and buy a new computer. A wonderful, amazing computer instead of my dinosaur laptop.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I am a vegitarian because I despise the idea of chewing on corpses and hate the taste of most meat.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
People being hateful of things they don't understand.

19. Do you like to dance?
Sometimes... depends on my mood and who I'm with. I suck at it thought, so hope the mood doesn't strike me when you're near.

20. George W Bush:
is an idiot who should have never even thought about being President

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her
Riley.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Skandar or something else fantastically cool.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
yes. I plan to move at least to the other side of the country if not another one entirely ASAP

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gate?
"What's up? How's life treating you?" (And then we laugh... get it???? :))

So... Music is the butter to my bread; the jelly to my peanut butter; the spoon to my fork; the apple to my eye... well, alright, it is super amazing. I seriously doubt I could live without music, and I am being entirely honest right here. When I am unable to listen to music for extended periods of time, guess what I do... hum to myself. Yeah, it's a little pathetic. 

Anyways, is anyone but me puzzled by the strange differences between music for different generations?

Okay, so take music from like the eighties and it is all these chicks singing in light voices and happy little tunes playing in the background. Nowadays it is all bumpin' and grindin' and sluttin' or emo, die die, slash my wrists because it hurts so good.

I love music, really, I'm just also naturally cynical. Don't mind the boundless sarcasm and irritating smart-ass comments, they're part of the job description. Wouldn't that be sweet to be paid for being a smart-ass? I think so. I'd so do it. Just irritate people all day... oh, wait, that's a job for telemarketers. Nevermind. Sitting in a box making phone calls all day would be bad for my complexion. You know us ridiculously good-looking people, we have to keep up with our tans.

It seems I have gone completely off subject... back to the world of jaunty tunes and killer lyrics.

Music is like its own form of oxygen. Without it everything is lessened. Just think about your favorite flick. When you are watching it the music, even if you don't pay attention to it, sets the mood. When you are reading something it is the same way. TV Shows? The same. Commercials? The same. What about advertisement jingles? Those are music. And balads. Poetry relates. Seriously, give me a subject or thing and I can relate it to music.

Okay, so I am super tired and about to fall asleep on my keyboard but I thought I would shout my praises to notes and measures before I collapse.

Over and Out, AI
 

So today was a heavy heavy God day. Anoyone but me have those?

First off, today at church we talked about Truths and Relativisms. 

Truths are things inherantly true, such as me showing you a tree and you saying 'that is a tree'. You say that is a tree, and it is a tree. It isn't both a tree and a non tree, so therefore that is a truth. Relativisms are things such as you may believe that hell is fiery and agony for eternity, but I believe that it is simply and existance without God. That may be true for you, but this is true for me. 

You can't live life on Relativisms. That's impossible. You can't go through life with "Well that may be true..." hanging on your lips every time a diffucult debate comes up. Truths are the way to live because certainty is the only way to make it through the day with a healthy mind. 

Without certainty you are always living in a way that is trying to please everyone. No, you are not simply being 'accepting' of everyone. You are failing to think enough to come up with your own convictions and laws to live by. As a strong Christian with Athiest siblings and non-religious parents, I feel that even though you are surrounded by varying amounts of believe and honesty and thoughtfullness, you need to find your own foothold in the world of faith. Whether it be without it or with it, well, that's your choice. 

But before you choose you have to understand accepting people. 

No, by saying choose a belief I am not saying forget and shun all others. Nor am I saying believe them all. The best I can explain is by delving into the first few levels of my own faith.

To lay the very frame of my beliefs bare, I believe that anyone who accepts Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior and believes He died on the Cross for us and our sins, then that person will go to Heaven. 

As for what Heaven is, well, that would be rather easy at first glance. My thoughts on the afterlife are not fully developed and I am unsure if they ever will be. Heaven is for those that, in their life on Earth, chose to live with God and believe in at least the basic framework of my beliefs I laid out before. It is a eutopia; a place not with clouds and angels but with all those who believe, God, and Jesus in a sin-free Earth. Hell is just the opposite. It is a place that is just like Earth, only eternally without God and those of Faith. It has sin ans bad things still happen there. It is not fire and brimstone but an eternal existance without the Holy Father. 

With this in mind, going to Hell is simply a choice one makes while on Earth to be without God. By making this choice they are declaring that they never wish to live with God, and their wishes are granted, giving them a life without their Holy Father. God loves us all and would never ever allow billions of his children to be tortured for all eternity, no matter how much they disgraced and despised him throughout their lives. 

On the way home from church my step-dad asked me this:
Say there is an Atheist who lives out a very happy life and is extremely kind to others. They do nothing more wrong than any Christian and are truly a good person. Then there is a Christian who lives the exact same way, only they also believe in God. Their religion is the only difference between these two. Does that mean that just because one of them doesn't accept an intangible savior that they are condemned to eternity in Hell?

Well, yes, they are. But as I said, this is a choice they make in their life. They CHOOSE to live eternally without God by choosing to live without him in their earthly life. 

Then he said that he doesn't think a religion is very good if they focus so much on the afterlife and not nearly as much on the here and now. That is the most uncertain part of anything, he told me, that's after I die, so why focus on it at all?

That's a good point, I conceded, and hastened to correct him. I informed him that my church does NOT focus on the afterlife. To be honest, I have never heard a sermon fully on Heaven and Hell at my church. Our motto, which the church and its members fully aspire to, is to lead people into a growing relationship with Jesus Christ. A relationship. Here and now. Not after you die, not in ten years. HERE and NOW. That's what we focus on, as well we should. Religion and Faith should serve to help us lead better lives before death. After death is simply the reaction to our action while alive. 

Unfortunately, we got home soon after I started.

Back onto the accepting others. During that car ride I was also asked "Do you believe that there is a possibility that what you believe is wrong?"

I sat in deliberation a moment, knowing my response but afraid to answer as if it was admitting a weakness. Finally, I willingly conceded. Yes, I do accept the possibility that I am wrong.

"Good," he said, suprising me at his happiness, "that, to me, is healthy. Because, honestly, there is a certainty that you are wrong. God and all of that is far too complex for us as humans to understand. We have a tendency to simplify things and that is what we have done with the Bible."

I feel like I have sufficiently started thoughts about religion in whoever reads this, or at least I hope I have. Anyways...

Over and Out,
AI